Long Time Since Church.

It’s been a long time since I’ve been to Church. I was dragged to the shed that served as The Uniting Church in Blackwater and after that I was shifted off to the Presbyterian-Methodist Schools Association to round out my brainwashing.

I can’t remember attending a service in any religious institution while I was a resident of Papua New Guinea or New Zealand, but they probably happened and there’s bugger all I can do about it now, so, who gives a shit?

Last week, on the Day Of The Sun I bumped into Ofa and invited her to lunch at my mums place. Leg of Lamb on a Sunday is pretty hard to turn down, but she did.

‘I’ve got Church’ she said.

Every day, I walk past The Uniting Church on my way to The Pub and a large portion of the congregation are from The South Pacific, so I thought she was being forced into some family-based nonsense, wedding, christening, etc.

But she was talking about her regular Sunday Gig. Having been relocated from The Bearded Lady to Rumpus Room, I found myself in Church without even asking for it. It is now apparent that the last Sunday of every month will provide a stage for a rotating house band and guest performers who will make themselves known as they see fit.

The most recent sermon was delivered by Ofa Fanaika, as is par for the course, but she was ably assisted with vocals by Kel Timmons. Travis Jenkins on guitar, Lee Brackenborough taking charge of bass, Nathan MacGregor rounded out the rhythm section on drums while Andrew Fincher took care of the fake ivory and a hundred odd punters heard the message.

At some point a brass section materialised and the guest vocalists made their presence known. The congregation filled the room and seemed to hear the message. They, at least, enjoyed the medium in which the message was disseminated.

I’m not a fan of organised religion or it’s institutions but Church doesn’t require much more organisation than making sure the band turns up, everything is plugged in properly and there is a mandatory band meeting at four twenty. Everything else swims along as seamlessly as the music. There’s also not having to throw into the collection tray or wait until the service is over before you can have refreshments, which is a bonus because you’d miss out on happy hour otherwise.

All in all there may be a few converts after last week and who knows, with all the bad press the old churches have been getting lately, good music a few beers and friendly people might be the ale that cures you.