Politics in 2018. Why do we bother?

Ahhh, the joys of politics.

The Liberal Party vote to privatise the ABC and a ‘brawl’ at a local branch meeting in the Mascot Ward of Bayside Council have spiced shit up this week and its only Tuesday. Only now having time to digest Trump & Kim (where were Kel and Brett by the way?), I can refocus on the domestic situation. The geo-political scene will probably play out as it has every other time The West has attempted to de-nuclearise North Korea and we’ll just end up lifting sanctions and reapplying them when Kim does bugger all to get rid of his bombs.

Given this probable outcome, there is fuck all reason to dissect the meeting or the capitulation of The USA regarding the whole dilemma. Only today did the confirmation come through that The US and The Republic of Korea would be postponing military exercises on The Korean Peninsula for the time being. Where are the bloody nukes? We have no evidence that Kim has done anything more than go home, get himself some kimchi, bash a concubine and sink bulk beer as he orders his generals to start hiding as much dodgy shit as they possibly can.

So, here we are. The world is still the same, but we’ve found ourselves in a bit of a predicament in The Land of Oz. The Federal Council of The Liberal Party, voted four to one in favour of a motion to sell the ABC to Packer or Murdoch or some other oligarch who will unashamedly promote the governments agenda and a day or so later The Libs will decide to kick the shit out of each other at a local government level branch meeting.

The Liberal front bench have reacted with speed to try and hose down this farce. Turnbull even said, “The ABC will never be privatised”, Morrison backed him up this morning and a bunch of other frontbenchers have been scrambling when asked about the issue. Apparently, The Federal Councils decisions have no bearing on The Parliamentary Liberal Party and they will continue to do whatever they bloody well feel like doing.

In this case, it’s a good thing, but it does raise some questions around statements from senior Liberals for decades along the lines of “We’re a broad church” and “Unlike The Labor Party, our members are free to a conscience vote on any piece of legislation” in so much as, they voted for it, why won’t you do it?

One reason. The Nationals will not support it. The coalition will falter. There is nowhere near enough cross-bench support in either house to break the coalition agreement and force any attempt at privatisation of Aunty. Why would The Libs want to do it anyway? It would be a failure on multiple fronts. Losing support from The Nats would hand Labor the keys to The Lodge and those pinko commies are never going to sell the national broadcaster. Compound that with most National voters only being able to access any news through The ABC due to coverage issues, which is another matter we can deal with at a later date. Young Michel McCormack is not going to short change his constituents in the electorate of The Riverina. To hear Sabra Lane be reassured by Scomo in his belief that Aunty needs to provide “fair and balanced coverage” before placating the host that she “did” provide such coverage went someway to reassure the public that we still have the prospect of an intelligent and most importantly, publicly funded national broadcaster.

It’s moments like this that we need to thank The Universe that we have The National Party. Hang on. What? Yes, I’m bloody serious. For the last couple of decades, a good proportion of the nations Primary Producers have started to move a bit to the left on some important issues. When David Littleproud came out the other day and acknowledged Climate Change as a real issue that effects The Agricultural Industry, he marked a change in the political discourse on the conservative side of politics in Australia. I could yammer on about CSG but I think a mention should be enough.

Until the rain stops falling for ever and the sea rises up to the lower slopes of The Great Divide, The Nats will back Aunty. Their constituents demand it. Having grown up in the bush, half the time the only information you could get was from Radio National and weather reports are an important part of rural life in this country, it would be political suicide for McCormack to back The Libs on dumping The ABC. So, we find ourselves pondering what The Libs really want from us.

Sweat and Blood most likely.

But what is the other option?

Shorten.

Will we fall into the old ‘better the Devil you know’ situation, or do we think we can trust the beady eyed little weasel to not throw Aunty under a bus?

An extensive viewing history of the news feed on The ABC has raised serious questions regarding this matter in my mind.

Labor hates The ABC almost as much as The Libs. Maybe not with the same venomous vitriol that Senator Abetz levels at the organisation, but enough to fuck with the broadcast when they’re announcing policy.

The basis for this argument rests on the precedents set by The Labor Party which was confirmed this morning. Shorten and Bowen scheduled their press conference for ten minutes before midday. While this may seem an innocuous coincidence, the timing is the key. At ten to twelve, they start the conference, give enough time for a preamble and Joe O’Brien will have to jump in and tell West Australian viewers that their regular ABC channel will be cutting off because the nine am news is finishing and can you please switch to the news channel to keep watching. Then, you cop three minutes of gibberish before Ros Childs comes on to welcome viewers on the East Coast who are waiting for their midday news.

It is at this moment that the most important parts of the announcement are drowned out by the presenter yammering on in an attempt to explain what has just happened and what may happen if you stick around to watch. If anything, this is Labor manipulating The Media to it’s advantage. Time the detail, so no one hears it and you can brush over anything contentious later on.

But when you ask Probyn for the first question and Phil Coorey for the second, you miss your opportunity. It may have been a considered decision to hand the two first questions to two of the best askers of said in the press gallery to do so. If you try it, you’d better have a good answer.

Of course, neither Andrew or Phil managed to rabbit/hat the situation and we were left with the blathering mess that is standard response for opposition parties of all persuasions. With only the members of the press present in the room able to hear the entire announcement, any citizen that intended to watch the delivery of opposition policy regarding tax reform would have nil to buggery idea as to what was actually announced.

And that’s where I’ll leave it. I could keep ranting, but my beer is nearly finished and I want to go home.

So, sell one of the last remaining independent and credible news agencies in the world and beat the living shit out of each other in Bayside Council, or vote for a pair of twits who can’t even formulate a coherent economic policy.

Those are your choices people. Or you could vote for Palmer, or Hanson, Bernardi, shit vote for fucking anyone. They tell us that this is a democracy, so go nuts, vote for The Shooters Party. Vote for The Sex Party. Fuck it, Vote Liberal or Labor. Exercise your democratic rights, but take a moment to step back and think about how much money we pay these people who are more shit when it comes to formulating an argument regarding social justice than an overprivileged private school undergraduate on their first day at Uni.

5:15 AM

5:15 AM.

I don’t know what time it is, but Mark Knopfler is repeating in my skull. I don’t think I’ve gotten more than two hours sleep per night for the last week. I’ve got too many deadlines in too short a space of time. I’m having new ideas and no ideas. I find myself working on articles when all I am supposed to be doing is pitching an idea and writing pitches when they want an article. Thankfully, a few accept multiple submissions, so I can combine my efforts. I need the internet at home. I’m procrastinating as I write this. I need 10,000 words and supporting evidence in a month today. I need four pitches and five articles by the end the month. I need sleep.

Watched Trump and Kim yesterday. That fucked one of my stories. Have to change the whole first half. Can’t decide on the others. They all need to be finished. Which one do I think is the best to be turned into a book proposal?

Now Scott Morrison is talking shit again on the news channel. At least he doesn’t talk to people as if they’re simpletons, well, not as much Turnbull anyway. Still looks smug though, because he knows he’s lying but people will still have to vote for someone and if you appeal to smug bastards like yourself that someone could be you.

Now Turnbull is on. Child Abuse Royal Commission response. Abuse, notice the way he says it? Resolute, that’s my favourite. Accepting 104 of 122 recommendations. What are you rejecting?    

“Our children must be kept safe.”

Except for those affected by the eighteen you don’t want a bar of. Now the AG is having a go, I can’t remember the new one’s name – he looks too much like Dan Tehan. Oh shit, Tehan’s there and now he’s speaking, this is fucking weird. Two Tehans One room. Turnbull Stuck in the Middle. Which one’s The Clown and which is The Joker? Christian, that’s it, Christian Porter. Thanks PM. Probably the most useful thing you’ll say all day.

Porter explains the eighteen. Apparently, he has to negotiate with the States. Convenient. Now you have someone else to blame. How can Turnbull pronounce ‘U’ correctly when he says ensuring but over pronounces it in every other multi syllable word?

Good Question Probyn. Huawei, cheeky fuckers trying to spy on The Solomon Islands. Now Turnbull takes a question from a male journalist over a female. Cabinet anyone? Overall reaction to Trump and Kim, satisfied. Old Trumpy is having a ‘Red Hot Go in his way’. And Turnbull called Shorten a sycophant. Which he probably is, but I sense a bit of pot and kettle going on here.

Finally, they’re gone.

Apparently, Shinzo Abe wants to have a chat with Kim. Probably because Trump didn’t bring up the kidnapped Japanese.

Now another Chinese company wants to buy some of our infrastructure. APA. Gas Pipelines. We’re already well on the way to selling our ports and agricultural land, why not our energy networks?

Gave up on News. Smoked joint. Finished Beer. Curled up on the couch. Didn’t sleep. Ate Eggs and Beans on Toast. Opened Beer. Smoked Joint. Shower. Beer. Joint. The Pub should be open now.

Internet. Submit. Submit another one. Beer.

Sleep.

Repeat.

Long Time Since Church.

It’s been a long time since I’ve been to Church. I was dragged to the shed that served as The Uniting Church in Blackwater and after that I was shifted off to the Presbyterian-Methodist Schools Association to round out my brainwashing.

I can’t remember attending a service in any religious institution while I was a resident of Papua New Guinea or New Zealand, but they probably happened and there’s bugger all I can do about it now, so, who gives a shit?

Last week, on the Day Of The Sun I bumped into Ofa and invited her to lunch at my mums place. Leg of Lamb on a Sunday is pretty hard to turn down, but she did.

‘I’ve got Church’ she said.

Every day, I walk past The Uniting Church on my way to The Pub and a large portion of the congregation are from The South Pacific, so I thought she was being forced into some family-based nonsense, wedding, christening, etc.

But she was talking about her regular Sunday Gig. Having been relocated from The Bearded Lady to Rumpus Room, I found myself in Church without even asking for it. It is now apparent that the last Sunday of every month will provide a stage for a rotating house band and guest performers who will make themselves known as they see fit.

The most recent sermon was delivered by Ofa Fanaika, as is par for the course, but she was ably assisted with vocals by Kel Timmons. Travis Jenkins on guitar, Lee Brackenborough taking charge of bass, Nathan MacGregor rounded out the rhythm section on drums while Andrew Fincher took care of the fake ivory and a hundred odd punters heard the message.

At some point a brass section materialised and the guest vocalists made their presence known. The congregation filled the room and seemed to hear the message. They, at least, enjoyed the medium in which the message was disseminated.

I’m not a fan of organised religion or it’s institutions but Church doesn’t require much more organisation than making sure the band turns up, everything is plugged in properly and there is a mandatory band meeting at four twenty. Everything else swims along as seamlessly as the music. There’s also not having to throw into the collection tray or wait until the service is over before you can have refreshments, which is a bonus because you’d miss out on happy hour otherwise.

All in all there may be a few converts after last week and who knows, with all the bad press the old churches have been getting lately, good music a few beers and friendly people might be the ale that cures you.